If there’s one thing Taylor Swift knows how to do, it’s roll out an album.

Swift first officially announced her new 12-track album, “The Life of a Showgirl,” on the New Heights podcast on Aug. 12. There, she revealed she had been working on the album during the last month of her longstanding Eras Tour, which consisted of 149 shows over 21 months.

“Working on this, I was physically exhausted at this point in the tour, but I was so mentally stimulated and excited to be creating,” Swift said.

“The Life of a Showgirl” came after much anticipation from fans who are always eager for a new release. And, in true Swift fashion, her team teased the album beforehand with cryptic yet obvious messaging.

On Aug. 11, Taylor Nation, an Instagram account run by Swift’s management, posted a series of photos from the Eras Tour with Swift wearing orange.

“Thinking about when she said ‘See you in the next era…’” the caption read, quoting Swift’s last words from the tour.

On the same day, the New Heights podcast, hosted by Swift’s boyfriend Travis Kelce, posted on Instagram saying a “very special guest” would be on their show Aug. 12.

Immediately, fans began speculating if Swift would be the special guest and whether they would get a new announcement.

“13 of August at 7 p.m. 13 + 87,” one fan commented on a Reddit forum, tying all numbers back to Swift and Kelce. 

Aside from sending fans into a total frenzy over potential easter eggs —anyone around during the “Reputation (Taylor’s Version)” hysteria knows what I mean— Swift is also infamous for releasing several variations before they’re released.

In 2020, Swift released eight deluxe versions of her album “Folklore,” which became the fastest-selling album in the United States that year. She continued this trend for the releases of “Midnights” and “The Tortured Poets Department,” with “The Tortured Poets Department” having 48 different versions, some physical, some digital.

Despite facing criticism and accusations of trying to block other artists from topping her sales, specifically from Charli xcx and Billie Eilish, Swift also released several versions of “The Life of a Showgirl.” Before the album’s release, 24 versions were available for purchase.

The buildup worked, and “The Life of a Showgirl” broke the record for the most presaves on Spotify with over five million saves before its Oct. 3 release. The record was previously held by “The Tortured Poets Department.”

With all this attention, Swift was really expected to deliver. But, unfortunately, the album felt flat and did not match the exciting burlesque aesthetic it was advertised with. 

Nonetheless, Swift was able to showcase some creativity with the first three songs of the album, “The Fate of Ophelia,” “Elizabeth Taylor,” and “Opalite.” These tracks worked together lyrically and made the album seem somewhat promising.

In “The Fate of Ophelia,” Swift references “Hamlet,” where a character named Ophelia goes mad and ends up drowning, presumably committing suicide. Swift uses this story to dramatically lay out the romantic undertones of the album, saying she was dug out of the grave and her heart was saved from the fate of Ophelia. Additionally, the song gives context to the cover art as it is heavily inspired by the Ophelia painting by John Everett Millais.

“The Fate of Ophelia” also matches the revealing rollout photos with suggestive lyrics.

“Don’t care where the hell you’ve been ‘cause now, you’re mine / It’s ‘bout to be the sleepless night you’ve been dreamin’ of.” Swift sings. 

The song mimics themes presented in previous songs on Swift’s 2017 album, “Reputation,” like “So it Goes…” and “Dress,” where she sings about romantic anticipation and “desperately waiting.” While “The Fate of Ophelia” is not lyrically up to par with these tracks, the idea is still fun as it is a sharp turn around from songs on “The Tortured Poet’s Department.” It gives listeners the idea that the focus is likely going to be on love pop songs.

“Elizabeth Taylor” and “Opalite” keep that promise as they were upbeat with lyrics full of yearning for forever romance. 

“Don’t you ever end up anything but mine.” Swift sings.

Production-wise, the songs sound like a mix of “Reputation” and “Midnights,” with a hint of her “Speak Now (Taylor’s Version)” vault song, “I Can See You.” If these concepts persisted, it would’ve made the album a more cohesive piece of work. After all, fans speculated it would be a sister album of “Reputation,” and “I Can See You” perfectly fits the flirtatious tone of the promo images released before the album.

Sadly, the consistency is lost starting with the next track, “Father Figure.”

“Father Figure” could easily go over the music video for Swift’s 2019 song, “The Man,” which follows a businessman who gets away with everything because of his gender. While the idea is respectable and perfect for her story, specifically pertaining to her master’s getting sold, the song didn’t stand out and was a bit disappointing.

Before “The Life of a Showgirl” came out, it was revealed that “Father Figure” was an interpolation of the 1987 George Michael song, “Father Figure.” Michael’s song has a way different vibe from Swift’s music, so it is exciting to hear that she would be going on a different path. Sadly, while the connection was clear, Swift’s version feels rushed and would’ve been better if the chorus vocals were approached differently. It slightly picked up in the end as the background vocals in the post-chorus added an enjoyable dynamic to the song. 

The next track, “Eldest Daughter,” is where “The Life of a Showgirl” really started to go downhill.

Hearing the piano at the beginning of the track is exciting because it resembles instrumentals from “Evermore,” which is one of Swift’s best albums lyrically. However, this was one of, if not the worst, of Swift’s songs lyrically, and the production did not back it up at any point.

As soon as the first verse finishes, it is evident that this song would not compare to her previous piano songs, like “Champagne Problems” and “Tolerate It.”

“Everyone’s unbothered ‘til they’re not / Every joke’s just trolling and memes,” Swift sings. “Sad as it seems, apathy is hot / Everybody’s cutthroat in the comments / Every single hot take is cold as ice.”

The verse lacks creativity, and it seems like it was written to be a rushed “X” post more than anything else. The chorus has the same energy, and is outdated and uninspiring.

“But I’m not a bad bitch, and this isn’t savage.” Swift sings.

“Eldest Daughter” is overall a hard listen, and the concept isn’t anything unique. Swift has written songs about media attention and backlash with well-written lyrics and strong production previously, which makes this song even more underwhelming. For example, in Swift’s album “Folklore,” she sings about wanting to get away from the internet in her bonus track, “The Lakes.”

“I’m not cut out for all these cynical clones / These hunters with cell phones,” Swift sings in the 2020 song. “What should be overburrowed under my skin / In heart-stopping waves of hurt / I’ve come too to watch some name-dropping sleaze / Tell me what are my words worth.”

Furthermore, “Eldest Daughter’s” chorus resembles Swift’s 2008 song “White Horse’s” chorus. 

“I’m not a princess, this ain’t a fairytale.” Swift sings in the “Fearless” track.

While the wording is not exactly the same, it’s still a similar detail to an idea that already feels recycled. There was no need for Swift to repeat concepts, and it just makes the album seem more like a downgrade compared to her previous work.

With “Actually Romantic,” the album starts to pick up again production-wise.

“Actually Romantic” is likely one of Swift’s shadiest songs, and fans immediately made the connection to singer Charli xcx, who opened for Swift’s “Reputation” tour in 2018. The beginning of a feud was speculated upon when Charli released her song “Sympathy is a Knife” on her hit album, “Brat.” Her lyrics hint at being upset with Swift and her relationships that tied them together.

Charli addressed the rumors of her song’s connection to Swift in 2024 by saying the song is about her anxiety and how she creates narratives in her head when she feels insecure or experiences self-doubt. She also mentioned her boyfriend telling her she’s just being paranoid, and there’s nothing to be upset about.

In “Actually Romantic,” Swift seemingly responds to Charli by saying that constantly talking badly about her resembles obsession. While others may be offended, Swift finds it romantic. 

The title has also been tied to Charli’s song, “Everything is Romantic,” which is also on the “Brat” album. Additionally, they are both track 7.

“I heard you call me ‘Boring Barbie’ when the coke’s got you brave.” Swift sings. “Really got to hand it to you / No man has ever loved me like you do.” 

Swift even hints at the idea of other people being annoyed with how much she’s mentioned in conversation.

“How many times has your boyfriend said / ‘Why are we always talkin’ bout her?’” Swift sings.

Not only is the writing shady, but the tone of Swift’s voice comes off very provocative. Even if listeners don’t agree with Swift’s position on the drama, the song is a conversation starter that is bound to bring more attention to “The Life of a Showgirl.”

All things considered, a conversation starter was a necessary addition to the lackluster album.

The next songs, “Wi$h Li$t” and “Wood,” are both love songs, but with very different natures.

In “Wi$h Li$t,” Swift sings about wanting to start a family and have privacy with someone she loves, highlighting simple desires.

“I just want you / Have a couple kids, got the whole block lookin’ like you / We tell the world to leave us alone, and they do.” Swift sings.

The lyrics are lighthearted, but the production is a bit bland compared to other songs Swift has written about the same topics.

The lyrics of wanting a family resemble “Peace” from the “Folklore” album, and wanting to be left alone for romance mirrors “Sweet Nothing” and “Paris” from the “Midnights” album.

It makes sense for Swift to revisit the ideas considering her recent engagement, but again, there is already such strong competition from her own discography. Her older work challenges the writing and production of “The Life of a Showgirl” love songs like “Wi$h Li$t” and are consistently better in quality.

“Wood” is where Swift taps into the sensual things introduced at the beginning of the album, but this time, there are direct links to Kelce.

The production of “Wood” is better than “Wi$h Li$t,” partly because it samples “I Want You Back” by The Jackson 5, but the pacing doesn’t match the song. Additionally, it doesn’t sound like something Swift would typically release, as the lyricism feels more like a knockoff of Sabrina Carpenter. 

After mentioning “New Heights of manhood” and not needing to catch a bouquet “to know a rock is on the way,” Swift says she will no longer need to knock on wood because bad romantic luck is behind her.

“Forgive me, it sounds cocky / He ah-matized me and opened my eyes.” Swift sings. “Redwood tree / It ain’t hard to see / His love was the key that opened my thighs.”

While there’s no problem with playful songs, “Wood” feels incomplete. Swift’s love songs previously, even if they were on the raunchier side, are usually not this repetitive and surface-level. “Wood” felt like a major downgrade compared to songs like “False God” and “So It Goes…” The song covers mature topics with immature and bland writing that just hopes to be saved by a shocking line of opening thighs.

The next songs, “Cancelled” and “Honey,” don’t get any better.

Like “Eldest Daughter,” “Cancelled” opens with a chorus that was not appealing in the slightest.

“Did you girlboss too close to the sun? / Did they catch you having far too much fun? / Come with me, when they see us, they’ll run / Something wicked this way comes.” Swift sings. “Good thing I like my friends cancelled.”

Once again, the lyrics feel like a rushed “X” post that plays on words that are trending. The song’s meaning is clear; Swift categorizes herself and her friends as people who are disliked in the media or cancelled, saying they all have the same scars. But the writing is cheap and feels more snobby than fun. There were so many ways she could have gone about this topic, and this was likely the worst and most unexciting one.

The same thing goes for “Honey.” The song is repetitive, which isn’t always a bad thing, but the production is bland and doesn’t back it at all.

The final track, “The Life of a Showgirl,” was expected to pack a punch as it features Carpenter.
Two of the biggest names in the pop music industry on one song seems like a powerful ending to the album, but it was forgettable. The collaboration was not enough to make “The Life of a Showgirl” stand out.

The song successfully follows the theatrical themes of the album, but it still feels underwhelming. The writing is mediocre, and it sounds like something from a high school musical production. Again, this isn’t always a bad thing, but there were way better ways to execute this track. If I wanted to listen to a song about Swift’s experience in show business, I would turn on “The Last Great American Dynasty,” “Mirrorball” or “The Lucky One” before this.

It’s possible to defend works like this by saying not every pop song has to be super serious, which is true. At the end of the day, not every Swift album has to have complex lyrics like “Evermore” and “Folklore” or the same level of production as “1989” and “Reputation,” but it should be at least more than what was offered in “The Life of a Showgirl.”

When the theme consistently delivers and effort is always evident, an album can sound like a full piece of work even with tracks that aren’t profound. With past albums like “Lover” and “Speak Now,” not all of the songs have deep meaningful lyrics or the most interesting production. “Ours” is a very happy-go-lucky and quirky song, but it is balanced with tracks like “Haunted” and “Long Live,” making the album enjoyable and amusing. For “The Life of a Showgirl,” I feel no track could save this album, as it lacked variety compared to her previous work.

I have been a fan of Swift since I was 3, and she’s been the most consistent interest of mine for as long as I can remember. I have a huge respect for her as a singer, songwriter and performer. Yet, “The Life of a Showgirl” lacked all of the aspects that make her albums entertaining to listen to. It truly felt so uninspired, devoid of concept and dispassionate, especially when it came to the romantic aspects.

“The Life of a Showgirl” is not repeatable or memorable, and this is Swift’s worst album to date.